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Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

I woke up around 3:30 this morning wide awake and still having trouble falling back to sleep, but I’m so thankful for a quiet house this morning. In a few hours it will erupt into laughing and squeals from two excited kiddos as they open their gifts from us and “Santa”.

Gifts they may have asked for and some they didn’t, but we knew they would enjoy. Some they may not enjoy and could possibly toss to the side out of not being interested..(pajamas and clothes lol).

But it got me to thinking about Jesus. The most precious Gift this world could ever receive, came from Heaven and was born to a virgin woman. God saw we needed Him and gave Him to us as His gift. Some have received Jesus with tears and squeals, while others may not know what kind of gift He is, other than that God gave Him to us, while many know about Him and have tossed Him to the side.

I have to admit I have done all 3. I received Jesus into my life at age 8..nothing crazy changed in my lifestyle but I began to feel his presence shortly after the tragedy of losing my Mom to CJD. I knew He was with me in moments of feeling suicidal as a teen, because I started feeling a peace and love like never before, rush over me. 

As I grew closer to Him, I started “unwrapping” more gifts from Him that He knew I would enjoy like, “hope” “peace” “compassion”. 

I then in my adult years started tossing this gift to the side..and not even realizing I was doing that to Him. I started filling my time with worthless things and those anxious feelings of low self esteem and failure, because I wasn’t successful, crept in. But Jesus..oh how He gets a hold of our hearts in those moments when the enemy whispers lies into our ear. He asked me when did His gift stop being enough? He lovingly showed me through the Bible that He was still actively pursuing my heart even though in that moment I felt so guilty for not doing what I knew I was supposed to be doing (having a relationship with Him) and instead making Him just another checkbox to check off. It was like as a parent when our child is throwing their arms up and saying, “I can’t do it!” And we scoop their little face into our hands and say, “Yes you can! I love you!” That is what it felt like on November 26th 2014. Jesus picked me up (spiritually speaking here, not trying to sound crazy) held my face and breathed into me a truths that I will never forget..actually I can’t forget because I wrote this all down that afternoon. But it was like my heart pondered the question, Who is Jesus really to me?

All kinds of words were that my heart could think of were written down in my joutnal. And in that moment I realized how much Jesus had brought me through and how much He truly loved me. That gift was picked back up, not by me but by Him, and placed back into my hands. 

His love is unexplainable and if I could describe it any other way I would say His love is necessary. I need Him. He doesn’t need me. But he chose me..just like He chose you. 

I have to end this because I can hear my son waking up…

I hope this encourages that Jesus is not a religion. He is not a story or a baby anymore. He is real and is personal. I don’t know where I’d be without Him in my life. I have some horrible stories of tragedies that I could excuse as my reason for not believing Him, but it was in those tragedies that I saw Him (spiritually speaking again) in my life. As confusing as it all was in the moment of trial and stress, I now can look back and see His fingerprints. He only wants the best for us and allows things to happen to grow us. 

Jesus came as a baby and left as a Mighty and Victorious Savior. What a gift God has given us and I pray you have or will receive Him. It is the best and MOST fulfilling gift you can ever receive.

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